I want to start by copying and pasting an excerpt that I read the other day from “My Utmost for His Highest” by Oswald Chambers.  Read it slowly to give it a chance to sink in. Let’s be real… I have to read everything he writes slowly, because half the time it’s over my head and if I read like more than 5 words in 30 seconds I end up completely lost. Anyyywaaays…

“We tend to think that if Jesus Christ compels us to do something and we are obedient to Him, He will lead us to great success. We should never have the thought that our dreams of success are God’s purpose for us. In fact, His purpose may be exactly the opposite. We have the idea that God is leading us toward a particular end or a desired goal, but He is not. The question of whether or not we arrive at a particular goal is of little importance, and reaching it becomes merely an episode along the way. What we see as only the process of reaching a particular end, God sees as the goal itself.

What is my vision of God’s purpose for me? Whatever it may be, His purpose is for me to depend on Him and on His power now. If I can stay calm, faithful, and unconfused while in the middle of the turmoil of life, the goal of the purpose of God is being accomplished in me. God is not working toward a particular finish— His purpose is the process itself. What He desires for me is that I see “Him walking on the sea” with no shore, no success, nor goal in sight, but simply having the absolute certainty that everything is all right because I see “Him walking on the sea” (Mark 6:49). It is the process, not the outcome, that is glorifying to God.

God’s training is for now, not later. His purpose is for this very minute, not for sometime in the future. We have nothing to do with what will follow our obedience, and we are wrong to concern ourselves with it. What people call preparation, God sees as the goal itself.

God’s purpose is to enable me to see that He can walk on the storms of my life right now. If we have a further goal in mind, we are not paying enough attention to the present time. However, if we realize that moment-by-moment obedience is the goal, then each moment as it comes is precious.”

I am the queen of looking ahead. I plan until I can’t plan anymore.  I think about planning for what’s to come more than I focus on what’s here now.  I want to be ready for what’s next and prepared for anything.  I want to reach the goals I set and see the fruit of my labor. I love the end result.

That being said, I was slapped across the face by these lovely words above.

This blew my mind for many reasons, but one being, very rarely do I think about the process.  A lot of times I don’t think about what I’m doing while I’m trying to reach a goal or the things I’m learning along the way.  I see “done” and “not done” or “now” and “not yet/never.”  It’s easy to have the mindset that God won’t get the glory until you have the final product. So work harder, right?? That’s how Satan twists my thoughts to think that the process and hard work can sometimes be worthless, especially when you aren’t seeing any fruit. The next reason being, just because God calls you to something, doesn’t mean it’s going to be a success.  It could mean the opposite. Say whaaaaa?!? BIG TIME SCARY.  I want to be successful at everything I put my mind to.  You mean God might want me to fail? More than once? Even when I work hard? And do it for His glory? I’m having trouble coming to terms with that one.  The type A in me doesn’t get how failing works into anyone’s plans.  When things aren’t going my way, I immediately look for how I can control it and fix it.  I want to find the answer in the chaotic storms of life.  ERRRRR (buzzer sound ha!) WRONG!

Chambers says here, the answer is this: obedience.  Moment by moment obedience is the goal.  If I’m constantly looking ahead to a big end result then I’m not looking at right now. And I know I miss a lot by doing this.  I miss reasons to be thankful, lessons I should be learning, and seeing God work in mighty ways. I’m just beginning to realize how much God is teaching me in the process. I don’t want to miss out on the moment or the lesson because I’m preoccupied with the outcome. I want to be obedient and receptive to his teaching now, not later.  I want to be “calm, faithful, and unconfused while in the middle of the turmoil of life…” Easier said than done, right?! Yikes!

Just remember, His purpose IS the process.