All it takes is a few words to get my wheels spinning a hundred miles a minute.  What does set my soul on fire? Seriously. What breaks my heart, fills me with abundant joy, gets me fired up, brings me closer to God and people, and so on?! The basic answer that I’ve come up with goes back to my “save the world” mentality.  But after really thinking about it I tried to narrow it down a little. Here’s the list I came up with:

What sets my soul on fire?

1. Being a mom and a wife.

2. Teaching girls/ women about self esteem, self worth, value, seeing themselves the way God sees them, God’s grace, etc.

3. Doing something to bring awareness to/stop human and sex trafficking and the exploitation of women and children.

4. Giving abused and underprivileged kids love, opportunities, and care.

5. Hungry, unwanted babies around the world that need a forever family.

All of these things are on my mind constantly.  They are 5 of the 438739 “tabs” open in my mind open at all times. These are the  5 I cry about at random times thinking about how I don’t do enough.  How am I, Dana of Morgantown, going to do anything about most of these things, especially #3-5.  Aside from being the best mom and wife I can be, I don’t know where to start.  This blog is an attempt at an outlet for #2 because I feel like I have so much to say and no one to say it to! (Well besides Josh, but he’s not a girl and doesn’t understand the tabs in my head and doesn’t really need pep talks or words from the heart on his value haha!)  So my thoughts immediately go to all of the reasons why I can’t do anything.  I become paralyzed almost instantly when I think about these things because I’m thinking about all of the cant’s and wont’s that are in the way.

So what does Satan tell me is in the way?

1. Money. I don’t have any.  Our current financial situation is not conducive to giving money to organizations that are in need and are trying to make headway on these very injustices. Satan says, “You can’t possibly give on top of tithing because then you’ll be on the streets begging for your own food.”

2. Wants.  I can be so selfish.  I hate it.  I pray all the time that God will take away my desire of wanting things.  I hate wanting everything at Target and TJ Maxx and on my IG feed.  My fleshly desires take over and turn those little wants into things I think I need. I obsess over things I want sometimes.  It’s ridiculous.  But I’m working on it, so that counts right?

3. Fear.  I’m a scaredy cat.  I’m scared of making mistakes, failing completely, and being ridiculed about decisions I make, meeting new people, being awkward, the list can go on.  I try my best to cover all of this up, (i’m a closet introvert) but the awkwardness just can’t be contained sometimes haha! Making an impact and changing people’s lives would require meeting people, taking chances, and letting my awkwardness be ok.

4. Myself.  I am SO in the way.  My anxious, over thinking, self induced craziness gets in the way big time! Satan uses what is actually a “go getter, type A” attitude and turns it into a “this is to big for you, let someone else save the world” attitude.  I drive myself nuts.  “JUST DO SOMETHING!!,” I tell myself over and over again.

I know that being a mom and a wife is so important and I know that that specific calling has been placed on my life. But I also know that God has placed these other fires in my soul for a reason.  Josh often encourages me by saying that I don’t have to worry or stress myself about figuring out what else I can be doing right now, but for me, it’s not really about just trying to do “stuff,” it’s about changing lives and reaching out to these hurting and broken women and children. It’s about teaching teen girls and young women that they are worth more and called to more than what our world says they are. It’s about helping them turn away from bad relationships and to see their true value, it’s about helping them release the chains of fear, lies, insecurities, and bad decisions that bind them.  It’s about bringing children out of lonely, poverty stricken, unhealthy situations to show them unconditional love, healthy relationships, and allowing them to have a place in a family.  It’s about showing Christ’s love to these people.  I can’t count on everyone else to do it, because what if everyone is counting on others to do it too, then no one does anything.  And then the tears flow.  There’s so many people that do nothing.  And currently I’m one of them.

I know that right now, financially and with Josh’s work schedule, anddd with a one year old, it is not realistic to think that we’ll be traveling the world doing big things, or adopting babies in the next 2 years and maybe not even in the next 10 years or starting any organizations for women and children.  What I do know is, there has to be a way to make an impact in my community in the Morgantown and Pittsburgh areas right now.  There has to be a way to use the little time and funds that I have to make an impact in someone’s life.

God is moving in my heart with ways that I can use my It Works! business to glorify him and advance His kingdom.  When I meet Him at the gates of heaven he’s not going to say good job working so hard and selling so many wraps, He’s going to say well done for using the resources I blessed you with to tell people about me and show them my love.  Well done for following the desires and fires I placed in your heart to be my hands and feet in this world.

There are still so many hows and whys and wheres in my mind but I’m praying and doing my research to find the answers. I want to be fearless as a mother, as a wife, and as a servant of Christ.  The pursuit is underway.

What sets your soul on fire? What would you pursue if you had no fears?

~Dana

A few books to read if you’re searching for what sets your soul on fire:

Interrupted by Jen Hatmaker

Undaunted by Christine Caine

Love Does by Bob Goff

Crazy Love by Francis Chan

Forgotten God by Francis Chan

The Bible. Um duh.